


Dune Armor

by mayoho



Category: Harmontown RPF
Genre: Drabble, Gen, Magical Realism, This is definitely the weirdest thing I've ever written
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-23
Updated: 2016-06-23
Packaged: 2018-07-16 18:10:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7278475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mayoho/pseuds/mayoho
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by this exchange in episode 158 of the Harmontown podcast (with Ryan Ridley, Spencer, and Dan in Jeff's absence):</p>
<p>“I’m a lot less nervous than last time I was here.”<br/>“Oh good, still more nervous than Jeff though.”<br/>“Oh god yeah, of course. He’s never--is he ever nervous, any time?”<br/>“I think he channels it via like tubes down his back, actual visible tubes, down...”<br/>“That’s why he always wears a suit.”<br/>“Yeah, it’s to mask his dune armor that takes his nervousness--”<br/>“Where does it go?”<br/>“It goes into his balls, obviously because the more nervous he should be the bigger his balls get.”<br/>“Uh huh.”<br/>“Which makes you go, oh he’s not nervous, and he’s like not anymore. Not thanks to balls... direct...”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dune Armor

Jeff’s arms are folded over the edge of the pool. Spencer can see his back, his spine, the plastic tubes running from under his hairline until they puncture through skin just above his swim trunks. They’re transparent, narrower than a cocktail straw.

“Have those always been there?”

“Yes?”

But Spencer and Jeff were on a tour bus together. He would have noticed. 

“Are you sure?”

“I don’t know.” It’s the tone Jeff uses when he _does_ know, but Spencer thinks he really doesn’t. 

He leans closer. Beads of liquid roll down inside one of the tubes. 

“You’re nervous.”

“Not anymore.”

**Author's Note:**

> I guess the conceit is that ideas can change reality. 
> 
> I'm not sure if I want feedback on this or am hoping that no one actually reads it, but what the heck, con-crit welcome!


End file.
